Sunday, 29 November 2015

1st Sunday of Advent

IT'S CHRISTMAS!!! WOOOOO!!!! Been blasting Christmas music since yesterday and eating All Teh Sweets! It is so nice with Christmas! I love it! Love it!
We made a little Advent-candle-thing and everything!
I have to say it's looking pretty swell! Apologies for the potatoe quality...

I am so insanely excited about Christmas! I can't wait until vacation times! WIll be so good to see friends and family again! Carina and Frank has got a new puppy, I cannot begin to describe how much I want to see that little thing! And the bastard owners, of course.
And everyone else. Because they are all amazing. Amazingness.
I miss Kristiansand a little.
Not gonna lie. It's close to my <3. Yes, you read me. It is close to my larger than three.
My larger than three is on my left leg, just for your information. I like my left leg. I wouldn't know what to do without it, honestly. Hobble, most likely. I don't care for hobbeling around, myself, I find it a little tedious.
Tedium is not something one should actively seek, is what I say.
I would love, LOVE to do a bad movie night whilst binging on christmas sweets and all sorts of crap. Not literal crap, mind you, but edible stuff that isn't too good for you.
OK. Not like rat poison or cyanide... I went off on a bit of a tangent... Nevermind.

I am very excited for Christmas. As I have mentioned before. I get to see the besties, the beasties, the wilderbeast and Charlie. Actually Charlie passed away, I am sad to say, so will only be the rest of them. I am excited though.

Oh Cat and Dog are still not getting along. Cat keeps close tabs on Dog and Dog just wants to play. Bless. Dog has gotten her first period as well, which is nice. No, it's actually kinda hilarious. She has got the funniest pants on... Well they are black. So you can't see them very well. But it's very funny.

 These are snaps from her mommy. I think they are hilarious. Bless her little face. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!




Friday, 6 November 2015

The Nasal Armageddon

Nasal Armageddon
Death Slowly Approaching
It's Man-flu Season.

Saturday, 17 October 2015

An Ode to Woolen Socks.

So as the year has slowly, yet rapidly progressed, there is one constant I have been without. A constant in my life I have yet to touch, to cradle in my weirdly long and stick-ish toes, woolen socks. 
I miss my woollen socks.
All of 'em.
I can't begin to describe the pure bliss of just smacking on a pair of them and stroll around like a fucking boss. Because that is what you become.
Woollen socks make you a boss.
A champion.
A winner.
The top dog.
Number one.
The victor.
The wo/man.

Hell yeah! What's not to love!? 

I miss them. Woollen socks, man. Woollen socks. 
OH MY GOD I NEED MY WOOLLEN SOCKS, I AM, LIKE, CRAVING THEM, SOMEWHAT! LIKE A CHOCOLATE BAR (WHICH INCIDENTALLY I AM ALSO CRAVING. JESUS CHRIST ON A STICK, I NEED ALL THE MONEY TO BUY ALL THE CHOCOLATES!!) ONLY IT'S FOR MY FEET! AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaa...!

-------------------------------------------------------

Yeah. This was written like a week/two weeks ago, my mind was ridden with madness from not having super-warm feet. This is my mind, dudes.
My sanity has probably knit itself a warm and cosy area in my brain where it hangs out. Impenetrable by all outside forces. That's wool for ya. Impenetrable from the outside. They should make bullet-proof vests out of it. Otherwise known as "vests".
Take my word for it. I know what I am talking about.

Well.
I should mention my feet are now cloaked by the delicious wool my forefathers made. From the deepest valleys to the highest mountains, the sheep grassed and grew stronger and more powerful wool than anyone could have anticipated. Little did they know that as their wool grew stronger so did they. They soon took to underground laboratories and made nuclear weapons in order to defend themselves, and soon colonized the entire north of Norway, Sweden, most of Finland and a bit of Russia. They bred into a new breed of sheep called DooMSHEEP:
"Definitely out of Malice, Sheep Hastily Eating Electric Plugs". As you can tell, they don't particularly care for Electric Plugs for some reason. Or maybe they like them a little too much? I guess that is one of those things we'll never really know the answer to.
There have been biologists tracking these sheep down and only one has successfully come back with photographic evidence:
Don't they look Ba-ad? 
I am not sorry.
Anyway, the ol' ancestors figured out a way to harvest their wool somehow. They stored it in the family Vault/Bunker of Riches, which my family has taken stuff out of for as long as we have kept track of. It's a pretty big vault. Not gonna lie. Well, the socks they made from this wool was so soft and so good at not sucking that they have knitted them for generations. We have a apretty good history of not getting shot where it matters because of it. Which is nice. Nobody wants a toe-less day-to-day existence. The grammar there was flawless.
The socks have been restored now, however.
I am enjoying the sense of safeness now.
I can finally go out and kick people again. I am so happy.

Saturday, 18 July 2015

I MOVED!

... In May!
But still, this is valid!

I was still sleeping on an air mattress courteously lent to me by my aunt (thank you, thank you!) up until a few days ago. After a month of sleeping on something that feels like a pee-sheet, I need to leave the moisture be. I am kind of in need of de-moisturization. Totally a thing. Not really. I just like being crude, I'm sorry.

I currently live with a folk high school mate, Erika, and her mate Martin, which is nice. It's like a big giant circle of love. Because why wouldn't a circle be love. Or vice versa.
Getting out of Søgne is kinda nice, but it's good to see the old chums again after all this time. Been too long, in fact.
We got a really nice flat between Carl Berner and Birkelunden and have been jamming all sorts of crap into it. It's amazing.

I also got a cat. Kvikk Lunsj. She is adorable. And totally not as lame as Nuka. She likes to cuddle. I like affectionate things. I miss Nuka though. The little shit. Apparently he likes to cuddle now as well. Which makes me angry. He should have been trained better to know his master. Which is me, of course. And everyone knows. Or should know.

I went home on a bit of a spur of the moment holiday. The first thing my cat does is run out the window, hang out on the roof and then either fall off or jump off it. 5 days it took her to run into a cat trap.
Well. We had the trap a day. So technically it only took her a couple of hours. But, you know. 5 days in the "wilderness". Little shit. Probably totes preggo in the eggo.

Hopefully will get a lot of boat-trips and niceness and possibly crabs, because crabs is the best thing in the world. Woo! Summer! I like summer. A lot. Like a friend.

Friday, 10 April 2015

#Domestic

Maybe I should address not saying a tweedle for 3 months, but I'm not going to.
Instead I am going to talk about life.
Life as we all know it.

That's right, the Sims.
My poor family is going through some troubles. And as I am sure everyone in the world, ever, cares about my Sims family, I don't see any reason at all not to write about them. I want to apologise for the un-screenshotted phone pictures but I was literally too lazy to make screenshots of this.

Anyway this all happened, or should I say, started to happen a time I had my eye on someone else, one of their children. God knows exactly what happened, but all of a sudden Husband and Wife were in the red. No longer on 100, but rather -100. It was a tragedy. Millie (the wife) tried to worry about the relationship, but Thomas would have nothing of it. Basically shouted "DENIED!" in her face. She apologised and apologised. He would have nothing of it.
I decided to go creative and used a potion of Friendship on her, hoping that would ease the blow a little. It helped a fraction, however they still won't even have a normal conversation. Only "getting to know" them and random "Salutes". It is all very strange.

 Millie stays in bed, day and night out of sadness and frustration. I suspect she has got a bit of a depression. Woe is them. What caused their relationship to go the drain like this!?

Words spread fast, and soon the whole neighbourhood found out about their slowly cracking marriage. Rather than worry they gossip. What a cruel, cruel town.
However as the Leader of the Free World, Millie is subjected to a lot of that. Married to a Master Psychic, they have gotten a lot of raised eyebrows in their time. However their love conquered that... Until now!

Thomas started mistreating his children, he neglected them, he fought with them, he gave them the lip, he was a certified asshole.
Then the day of their graduation came.

They were free. Millie wept with joy, proud of her children and their accomplishments, Thomas grumbled a quiet "proud of you" to them.
The children love their mother, but their father? No couldn't stand him. He had changed.
After they got their diplomas their mind were made up. They subsequently kissed their mother's cheek and gave their father the stink-eye and moved out.

The reason for why he had changed is still a mystery, however a strange blue glow has been observed around him at weird times...

So an obvious solution, I figured, was to bring in Millie's ex-husband and some of their kids into the house. I mean if Thomas really wanted a bit of a challenge, then I will give it to him.

To be continued...?

Edit: Not to be continued! I found the reason why! HIS PROFESSION! He was a master Psychic or whatever the English version of that thing is, and apparently that makes a lot of people hate you! Amazing! So I made him quit his job and their love life is back to normal! They did their woohoo's and after he wet himself. Casual Wednesday....