Chez Maria. (aka, Maria's crib)

Woah woah woah! Welcome to my crib, cuz! Aaaa-yeah!
Today we have a... Nah I can't be arsed on taking that "crib joke any further". It's a little exhausting.

Anyway, let us begin. ALLEZ!
MY ROOM! I am well happy with my little cave. My "woman cave", as I'd like to call it. Because I am classy like that. My Classy Hole, if it were. Because it is so tiny.
Tiny, tiny class-hole. Like in WoW! They will be getting class holes. Not like mine, but not TOTALLY unlike mine.

So I just set up that black plank-shelf-fuck on the wall the other day (thank you Erika!) and it's totally crooked and if anyone has any tips as to how to make it less crooked, please tell me. I need the answer to that life-riddle! Such riddle, much amaze. Anyway, that was my hole. My hole is a little messy, but that's OK. It's only on the internet.

Outside is the kitchen and dining room. Easy access, you know. With the night-feasts. If you know what's good for you, night-feasts are definitely it. Feasting upon unhealthy (or healthy, depending on what kind of freak it is) food at ungodly hours of the night? Best thing ever.
Speaking of... I think I need a snack. Nay, a feast. A feast for the soul.

Or maybe not. Making food is a chore. I want a personal chef. I am petitioning for a personal chef. That wants to cook for me for free. I wish slavery was allowed.... (NB: I DO NOT ACTUALLY WISH SLAVERY WAS REAL.)



















Ah, the Throne Room. Or Throne Rooms as it is in this case. THAT'S RIGHT! We've got two crapperoonies! It is amazing. You can have a marathon shit! Room-to-room shitting! We always have at least 3 rolls ready in case there is such an event. Or an emergency. Prepare for everything, as they say. I take this very seriously. Especially when it comes to toilets. You never know when the gates of Hell open their gates! I am in such a classy mood tonight.

Then there is the Halls of Reflection. Where you can go and reflect upon your person. Or your... No I can't even make up (heh, unintentional pun. Ish. I mean you have to use... mirrors... Nevermind.) bad mirror jokes. It's getting late and there are a lot of pictures to go. I need to save up my wit and amazingness for the rest of the shizzwazz.

Living room is where all the Boobarella-watching is happening. All the Boobarella action. Now, please let me direct your attention to the lamp.
Please observe the lamp.

The lamp is observable. 

Guess who made that shit happen!

OH YES, YOURS TRULY!
I did that. I couldn't keep it in any more. I had to spoil it.
Me.
Maria. 

The beast!

I am the handiest person everyone knows.

Right. That was my crib. It's starting to feel like home now as well, which is nice. I forgot about the two terraces, but they aren't all that interesting at the moment. One holds our laundry and the other a lot of sofa cushions. Because we can't be arsed buying outside furniture. But it's OK, because they are really comfortable.
Anyway, it's getting rather lengthy now, so I will END TIME ITSELF! You know how it is.